I was talking to a good friend this week about her grandbabies.
These young ladies are very close in age and struggle with sibling rivalry. They are constantly bickering and it’s hard to hang out in their space for too long without just saying “STOP.”
Send them to their separate corners and buy yourself a bit of peace.
Before you stop reading … think this doesn’t apply to you … it’s not just kids who display this type of behavior. It happens in relationships of all ages and combinations.
It’s referred to as a “power struggle.”
And, it leaves no one feeling powerful. A classic “lose/lose.”
But it’s easy to turn it around … IF you’re willing to try a different approach.
Whenever you find yourself in a power struggle with someone, step away and practice appreciation.
WHAT???!!!
You read me right. You’re going to use appreciation to completely change the dynamic.
Since it’s really challenging to appreciate something that you’re feeling quite unappreciative of in the moment, it’s best to start with something easy.
Find 3 things you CAN appreciate without “resistance.” For me, that list might look like this.
- Butterflies
- Sunrise
- Green tea
If I take a few moments to lean into these 3 things … even closing my eyes
to visualize them, the energy will begin to shift.
When you feel that happening, try finding 1 thing to appreciate about the person you’re in the power struggle with.
- What are they really good at?
- What do they like that “lights them up?”
- What feature about their appearance is really appealing?
The more you practice appreciation, you’ll find yourself looking for things to appreciate even when you’re not trying.
It’s truly magical. I call it Aware Appreciation and it’s one of the exercises we practice in my MOLT Method™ Program.
