A few nights ago, I found myself wide awake … again.
Not because I had caffeine too late or forgot to turn on the air conditioning in the bedroom 🛏️.
No, this time it was mental unrest …
… those lingering, half-formed images that stay just below the surface and hijack peaceful sleep.
Here’s what happened …
My husband and I were trying to find a show we could enjoy together. He loves suspenseful TV.
I lean toward the Hallmark channel because I know I’m sensitive. What I take in … especially right before bed … sticks with me.
It always has … but I wasn’t always as aware as I am now.
I still remember the week after I saw Titanic 🚢 … no sleep.
And I haven’t gone past my ankles in the ocean since seeing Jaws fifty years ago.
He convinced me that I would LOVE Scandal. “It’s not too intense,” he said. “You’ll be fine.”
I wasn’t.
In his defense, Livvie is a “bad ass” gladiator in a suit. I love that about her but the world she works and lives in is WAY TOO DARK to even dip my toes in.
After a few peaceful months of reliable deep sleep, I was suddenly waking again with disturbing images in my mind …
… and a head full of what I call open loops.
Unanswered questions. Emotional residue.
The kind of mental and emotional disturbance that keeps your nervous system on high alert. It’s a form of trauma.
And I was mad.
At myself.
At him.
At the whole idea that this is what people call entertainment.
But here’s my truth: I can’t afford to experiment with stressors that don’t suit my system.
And, most likely … neither can you.
Wellness Warriors know that just because the world normalizes something … doesn’t make it nourishing …
… for body, mind or soul.
We’re learning to take responsibility for our choices … what we …
- eat 🍽️
- watch 📺
- listen to 👂🏻
- and absorb. 🧽
This week, I invite you to become curious about what you’re letting in. If sleep has been elusive, it might not be your environment …
… it might be your diet.
This is a diet that no amount of intermittent fasting can fix. You may need a media fast to support your mental and emotional well-being.
You are your own PCP (Primary Care Person), and your choices matter … more than the mainstream media would have you believe.